Adventures in parenting

Where goats go to escape
Thor Sedan
Posts: 1139
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 9:50 am

inactionman wrote: Thu Aug 19, 2021 10:24 am Sorry to hear mate, but (I'm hoping I'm not being condescending) having parents who really, really understand and act for their kids is such a fantastic thing, there will always be hard moments but you'll get through them. As you note, they've previously been really happy but lockdown has knocked them sidewards, I'm sure time and support will 'right the ship'. Yep, some significant time has been missed in terms of education, in its place some significant time has been spent with parents which is invaluable - if exhausting.

In terms of the bolded, if there's one thing I've learnt about social media is that many people who portray their perfect life have anything but, and it's a way of compensating. Johnny probably was pretty good at football, but has broken half the windows in the house and throws a wobbly every time he's not passed the ball. (I'm being unfair on many social media users, as who would post a photo of their kid having a meltdown? You'll only ever see the good times, so you necessarily get a very unrealistic picture)
Not condescending at all. Sometimes parents of kids with additional needs just want to hear folk say that we're doing a good job. So often we're made to feel that we are not (whether on purpose or with accidental remarks).

I'm stupid when it comes to social media - during lockdown it became such an important way of keeping in touch with folk - but then the rancid rose tinting effect took hold. All these wonderful families and parents giving their kids such a varied and interesting lockdown experience - while we were happy if we managed to get the kids out of pyjamas. We both know that it is a tiny snapshot of what home life is really like - but the brain is a cruel bastard sometimes.
Thor Sedan
Posts: 1139
Joined: Thu Jul 02, 2020 9:50 am

Margin__Walker wrote: Thu Aug 19, 2021 10:38 am Sorry to hear that Thor. Parenting can definitely be incredibly tough, although most are fortunate not to have that kind of challenge to deal with.

As well as my boy, I also help out with some wrap around childcare for my 7yo nephew who has recently been diagnosed. He's always had some heavy behavioural quirks and anxieties, but it's become much more prominent over the last year or two. The biggest issue at the moment is anxiety he has around eating. He goes through phases of refusing to eat (with associated weight loss) as a result of a fear of choking or being sick. He often has panic attacks over it and has recently taken to making himself sick after eating to maintain control over the process.

It's obviously hugely stressful for his parents, so I can only imagine what it's like to have to deal day to day with your situation. Hopefully the return to some sort of normality will result in a little more structure and certainty that they can rely on.
Is that ARFID? That is such a cruel disorder.
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Margin__Walker
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Joined: Tue Jun 30, 2020 5:47 am

Thor Sedan wrote: Thu Aug 19, 2021 11:24 am
Margin__Walker wrote: Thu Aug 19, 2021 10:38 am Sorry to hear that Thor. Parenting can definitely be incredibly tough, although most are fortunate not to have that kind of challenge to deal with.

As well as my boy, I also help out with some wrap around childcare for my 7yo nephew who has recently been diagnosed. He's always had some heavy behavioural quirks and anxieties, but it's become much more prominent over the last year or two. The biggest issue at the moment is anxiety he has around eating. He goes through phases of refusing to eat (with associated weight loss) as a result of a fear of choking or being sick. He often has panic attacks over it and has recently taken to making himself sick after eating to maintain control over the process.

It's obviously hugely stressful for his parents, so I can only imagine what it's like to have to deal day to day with your situation. Hopefully the return to some sort of normality will result in a little more structure and certainty that they can rely on.
Is that ARFID? That is such a cruel disorder.
I actually don't know. It's got worse in a hurry recently. 18 months or so ago he stopped eating and lost weight. That improved massively though and it's only recently that the vomiting thing has really manifested itself. Not sure if ARFID has been mentioned in any of the panel discussions that have taken place on him (I'd never heard of it).

Will mention it to his Mum when I next see here though and some of that fits very well.
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