The Worst Game of Rugby You've Watched

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Jim Lahey
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is currently on Premier Sports, Dragons v Ulster. Gale winds and pissing rain.

Many moons ago I was on the bench (didn't get off it) for a underage rep game between Connacht and Ulster played in a hurricane at Athlone and it ended 0-0. That was my PB worst game up until this classic.
Ian Madigan for Ireland.
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Openside
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2nd Lions test against SA in last series was the dullest game I have ever seen! Nothing happened for 80 minutes.
TheNatalShark
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It was somewhat entertaining in its awfulness, but when the Highlanders beat the Crusaders 6-0 in 2009.

First points were in like the last 10 minutes
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Paddington Bear
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Sarries 3 - Glasgow 3 in pissing rain at Hughenden.

Playing wise I’ve played in two 0-0s, one on a quagmire at Aylesbury and one in a howling sleetstorm at Barnet. Played on the wing in the latter having agreed to play that morning. My opposite number and I spent most of the game chatting as the chance of the ball coming our way was essentially zero. Turned out we are both big cricket fans. The only time I touched the ball I collected a kick, the forwards were stuck in the mud and I scored untouched under the posts only for as I put the ball down their TJ to retrospectively claim a foot in touch. Same time next week skip?
Old men forget: yet all shall be forgot, But he'll remember with advantages, What feats he did that day
Ovals
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I tend to wipe such games from my memory - but there were some godawful internationals back in the 70's - back when you could kick for touch from anywhere and tries were quite a rarity.
Biffer
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I’ve been an Edinburgh season ticket holder for ten years. I guarantee I’ve seen worse games than any of you.
And are there two g’s in Bugger Off?
petej
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two tries so definitely not the worst. Pretty sure i've attended matches that were 6-3 and 3-0 at Leicester where the only exciting thing that happened was John Liley horrifically missing a garryowen.
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Lobby
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Ovals wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:13 pm I tend to wipe such games from my memory - but there were some godawful internationals back in the 70's - back when you could kick for touch from anywhere and tries were quite a rarity.
There were 111 line outs in the Scotland Wales 5N match in 1963, and almost nothing else of note. The Welsh scrum half kicked almost every ball out that he received (the Welsh fly half received only 2 passes in the entire game. Wales won 6 - 0. I expect that is quite probably one of the worst games ever.

The worst game I can remember watching was the pool match between Wales and Ireland in the 1995 World Cup. Two shit teams playing badly meant most viewers had lost the will to live long before the end.
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Mahoney
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There was a Quins-Worcester game at the Stoop in early 2005 or 2006 when I was sat at the top of the roofless south stand in the sleet and we had a 10 minute scrum. Worcs had us on toast, and each time the entire Quins pack just unbound and hinged at 90 degrees, leaving Worcs with nothing in front of them, but for some reason the ref then reset it. Over and over again.
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Lobby
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Mahoney wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:36 pm There was a Quins-Worcester game at the Stoop in early 2005 or 2006 when I was sat at the top of the roofless south stand in the sleet and we had a 10 minute scrum. Worcs had us on toast, and each time the entire Quins pack just unbound and hinged at 90 degrees, leaving Worcs with nothing in front of them, but for some reason the ref then reset it. Over and over again.
Was the ref related to Ben O’Keeffe?
GogLais
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Lobby wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:35 pm
Ovals wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:13 pm I tend to wipe such games from my memory - but there were some godawful internationals back in the 70's - back when you could kick for touch from anywhere and tries were quite a rarity.
There were 111 line outs in the Scotland Wales 5N match in 1963, and almost nothing else of note. The Welsh scrum half kicked almost every ball out that he received (the Welsh fly half received only 2 passes in the entire game. Wales won 6 - 0. I expect that is quite probably one of the worst games ever.
One for the connoisseur.
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Uncle fester
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Ireland v Scotland 6-6 draw in 90's.
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Torquemada 1420
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Biffer wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:15 pm I’ve been an Edinburgh season ticket holder for ten years. I guarantee I’ve seen worse games than any of you.
Hmm. I've been watching top level rugby in France for 30+ years. Often the brawls were the only entertainment. But last seasons Pro2 play off game of Biarritz v Bayonne would be right up there with anything else.
Ovals
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Lobby wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:35 pm
Ovals wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 4:13 pm I tend to wipe such games from my memory - but there were some godawful internationals back in the 70's - back when you could kick for touch from anywhere and tries were quite a rarity.
There were 111 line outs in the Scotland Wales 5N match in 1963, and almost nothing else of note. The Welsh scrum half kicked almost every ball out that he received (the Welsh fly half received only 2 passes in the entire game. Wales won 6 - 0. I expect that is quite probably one of the worst games ever.

The worst game I can remember watching was the pool match between Wales and Ireland in the 1995 World Cup. Two shit teams playing badly meant most viewers had lost the will to live long before the end.
That's the sort of thing I had in mind - there were lots of games of that type back then. I only watched the 6n back in those days and can remember just how turgid some of the matches were. In that 63 season, England won the championship with a total points score of 29 for, 19 against - including a 0-0 draw v France, :yawn:
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Margin__Walker
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The list of crushing/embarrassing/agonising defeats is too long to mention. In terms of worst games though, this one was right up there.

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2011/ ... ish-report

I'd just started seeing my wife. She'd never been to a game before, so on a trip down to see relatives, we nipped over to Watford to see this one. Half hoping she'd catch the bug too.

That was the last game she went to (barring a trip to Donny when we were in the Championship, where she tagged along to have a natter with a friend's wife). It was fucking freezing, at a shit ground and the dullest messy scrum fest imaginable. Absolutely nothing of note happened.
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Guy Smiley
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The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

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sockwithaticket
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There was a Toulouse - Bath game at the Rec that finished up 6 - 3 (maybe 2009?). The depths of winter could be an awful time at the rec in relatively nice weather, but the conditions were filthy and the Rec was at it's boggy worst. There were pools of standing water on the pitch that legitimately made me worry that players at the bottom of the ruck stood a chance of drowining.
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Yr Alban
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Define ‘worst’.

Wales v Scotland 2014 would take some beating for me. First ever 6N away trip. Hogg got himself sent off after 30 minutes. Scott Johnson (interim head coach at the time) decided to leave a gaping hole in the back line rather than take off a flanker. Wales then scored off every attack and won 51-3. Had to stay and watch all of it because I was with a group of people I didn’t know well.
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fishfoodie
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sockwithaticket wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm There was a Toulouse - Bath game at the Rec that finished up 6 - 3 (maybe 2009?). The depths of winter could be an awful time at the rec in relatively nice weather, but the conditions were filthy and the Rec was at it's boggy worst. There were pools of standing water on the pitch that legitimately made me worry that players at the bottom of the ruck stood a chance of drowining.
<<shiver>>

Not the worst game I watched; but my worst memory of a game I played in; & coincidentally how I got my nickname in school.
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Gumboot
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Openside wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 3:20 pm 2nd Lions test against SA in last series was the dullest game I have ever seen! Nothing happened for 80 minutes.
Only 80 minutes? Seemed more like 8 hours.

It was anti-rugby at its worst - such a disappointing game that I just couldn't be arsed watching the third test.
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Guy Smiley
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Gumboot wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 8:35 pm
Openside wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 3:20 pm 2nd Lions test against SA in last series was the dullest game I have ever seen! Nothing happened for 80 minutes.
Only 80 minutes? Seemed more like 8 hours.

It was anti-rugby at its worst - such a disappointing game that I just couldn't be arsed watching the third test.
From memory, that game ended up running for 108 minutes. I think there was a lineout at about 1.30 in and both teams went into a fucking huddle with trainers out FFS. The commentators were joking about the local curfew stopping play in the second half.

It was an abomination.
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Mr Bungle
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Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

Image
My brother woz there :lolno:
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Jim Lahey
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Yr Alban wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 8:21 pm Define ‘worst’.

Wales v Scotland 2014 would take some beating for me. First ever 6N away trip. Hogg got himself sent off after 30 minutes. Scott Johnson (interim head coach at the time) decided to leave a gaping hole in the back line rather than take off a flanker. Wales then scored off every attack and won 51-3. Had to stay and watch all of it because I was with a group of people I didn’t know well.
Worst as in absolutely dire quality of rugby for 80mins, rather than an agonising defeat.
Ian Madigan for Ireland.
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Guy Smiley
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Mr Bungle wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 9:07 pm
Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

Image
My brother woz there :lolno:
:lol: What a highlight
GogLais
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Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

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I see what you mean.
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Mr Bungle
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Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 9:35 pm
Mr Bungle wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 9:07 pm
Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

Image
My brother woz there :lolno:
:lol: What a highlight
He was ringing us from the stands pre kick off adamant that it would have to be postponed.
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Kiwias
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Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

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:grin:
This belongs in the "The Worst Game of Rugby You've Not Watched" thread.
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Enzedder
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All Blacks Vs Ireland in the old Athletic Park in Wellington June 1976 - in a howling southerly.

11 - 3 final score I think but my eyes froze
I drink and I forget things.
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Chilli
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$harks/ Warathas late 90's 6-6.

Perfect conditions. Shit rugby.
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clydecloggie
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Worst game I was in the stands for was the 2016 Calcutta Cup.

Scotland at its worst, and England at its most unimaginative. The 15-9 result was as inevitable as it got and even the two England tries were barely worth watching.

The game that really got me questioning whether I actually liked rugby.
inactionman
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sockwithaticket wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm There was a Toulouse - Bath game at the Rec that finished up 6 - 3 (maybe 2009?). The depths of winter could be an awful time at the rec in relatively nice weather, but the conditions were filthy and the Rec was at it's boggy worst. There were pools of standing water on the pitch that legitimately made me worry that players at the bottom of the ruck stood a chance of drowining.
I was at that one, ended up going to watch second half in club bar. Horrible.
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MungoMan
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Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

Image
Christchurch. And for some reason I recalled it as being one of the Cru - 'tah GFs. But frankly, how would anyone know other than by the text on the TV screen?

The actual cameras showed at-ground vision equivalent to the inside of a grey hat.
Crash669
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clydecloggie wrote: Mon Feb 21, 2022 8:11 am Worst game I was in the stands for was the 2016 Calcutta Cup.

Scotland at its worst, and England at its most unimaginative. The 15-9 result was as inevitable as it got and even the two England tries were barely worth watching.

The game that really got me questioning whether I actually liked rugby.
The 2020 Calcutta cup game was also fucking abysmal though only some blame goes on the teams there since it was actually blowing a hurricane. About the only thing if note was watching box kicks get blown backwards and some lunatic trying to start a fight with Slick during the anthems.

There are a lot of Sale games for about 2008-9 that I've erased from my memory. A 6-3 scoreline in January weather really drains the spirit.
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Yr Alban
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Jim Lahey wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 9:20 pm
Yr Alban wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 8:21 pm Define ‘worst’.

Wales v Scotland 2014 would take some beating for me. First ever 6N away trip. Hogg got himself sent off after 30 minutes. Scott Johnson (interim head coach at the time) decided to leave a gaping hole in the back line rather than take off a flanker. Wales then scored off every attack and won 51-3. Had to stay and watch all of it because I was with a group of people I didn’t know well.
Worst as in absolutely dire quality of rugby for 80mins, rather than an agonising defeat.
Yeah, figured as much.

In which case I’ll go for a Calcutta Cup match at MF, but I’m not quite certain which. Logically it must have been 1992. Anyway, it involved the ball disappearing up Dean Richards’ jersey for 80 minutes.

EDIT: cancel that. Must have been 1996 - there were no tries in that game. I thought Richards had retired by then, but apparently not. I was also sure that I had split up with the girl whose debentures I used to use, but on reflection I was in a different stand that day, so I must have got the tickets from another source.
Last edited by Yr Alban on Mon Feb 21, 2022 5:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.
It is in truth not for glory, nor riches, nor honours that we are fighting, but for freedom - for that alone, which no honest man gives up but with life itself.
sockwithaticket
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inactionman wrote: Mon Feb 21, 2022 8:41 am
sockwithaticket wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm There was a Toulouse - Bath game at the Rec that finished up 6 - 3 (maybe 2009?). The depths of winter could be an awful time at the rec in relatively nice weather, but the conditions were filthy and the Rec was at it's boggy worst. There were pools of standing water on the pitch that legitimately made me worry that players at the bottom of the ruck stood a chance of drowining.
I was at that one, ended up going to watch second half in club bar. Horrible.
Oof, I can only imagine. Just watching it on TV made me feel at risk of exposure.
Last edited by sockwithaticket on Mon Feb 21, 2022 6:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Lobby
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Yr Alban wrote: Mon Feb 21, 2022 5:06 pm
Jim Lahey wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 9:20 pm
Yr Alban wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 8:21 pm Define ‘worst’.

Wales v Scotland 2014 would take some beating for me. First ever 6N away trip. Hogg got himself sent off after 30 minutes. Scott Johnson (interim head coach at the time) decided to leave a gaping hole in the back line rather than take off a flanker. Wales then scored off every attack and won 51-3. Had to stay and watch all of it because I was with a group of people I didn’t know well.
Worst as in absolutely dire quality of rugby for 80mins, rather than an agonising defeat.
Yeah, figured as much.

In which case I’ll go for a Calcutta Cup match at MF, but I’m not quite certain which. Logically it must have been 1992. Anyway, it involved the ball disappearing up Dean Richards’ jersey for 80 minutes.

EDIT: cancel that. Must have been 1996 - there were no tries in that game. I thought Richards had retired by then, but apparently not. I was also sure that I had split up with the girl whose debentures I used to use, but on reflection I was in a different stand that day, so I must have got the tickets from another source.
I remember that game well. I can understand why it won’t be remembered fondly by any Scottish supporters (and it certainly wasn’t an advert for free-flowing rugby), but there was something magnificent about the way Dean Richards, who had been recalled to the side for one of his last international appearances, single-handedly dominated possession and effectively destroyed Scotland’s game at source.

Although he seemed to do little more than amble about with his socks around his ankles, he seemed always to be where he Scotland wanted him least. Every kick seemed to be directed to where he was waiting to receive it; every time a tackle or ruck broke down he would emerge with the ball. By the end, I can imagine that everyone in Scotland was mightily sick of the sight of him.
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Yr Alban
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Lobby wrote: Mon Feb 21, 2022 5:47 pm
Yr Alban wrote: Mon Feb 21, 2022 5:06 pm
Jim Lahey wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 9:20 pm

Worst as in absolutely dire quality of rugby for 80mins, rather than an agonising defeat.
Yeah, figured as much.

In which case I’ll go for a Calcutta Cup match at MF, but I’m not quite certain which. Logically it must have been 1992. Anyway, it involved the ball disappearing up Dean Richards’ jersey for 80 minutes.

EDIT: cancel that. Must have been 1996 - there were no tries in that game. I thought Richards had retired by then, but apparently not. I was also sure that I had split up with the girl whose debentures I used to use, but on reflection I was in a different stand that day, so I must have got the tickets from another source.
I remember that game well. I can understand why it won’t be remembered fondly by any Scottish supporters (and it certainly wasn’t an advert for free-flowing rugby), but there was something magnificent about the way Dean Richards, who had been recalled to the side for one of his last international appearances, single-handedly dominated possession and effectively destroyed Scotland’s game at source.

Although he seemed to do little more than amble about with his socks around his ankles, he seemed always to be where he Scotland wanted him least. Every kick seemed to be directed to where he was waiting to receive it; every time a tackle or ruck broke down he would emerge with the ball. By the end, I can imagine that everyone in Scotland was mightily sick of the sight of him.
That’s an uncanny summary of the game. Great performance by Richards, no argument, but a turgid horror of a game to watch, and if you were Scottish you couldn’t even say ‘well at least it was a win’
It is in truth not for glory, nor riches, nor honours that we are fighting, but for freedom - for that alone, which no honest man gives up but with life itself.
Monkey Magic
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Went to a blues vs reds game at Eden Park which I can't even remember the final score was, maybe 3-3 or 6-3. Made even worse by how crap our seats were
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Grandpa
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MungoMan wrote: Mon Feb 21, 2022 9:35 am
Guy Smiley wrote: Sun Feb 20, 2022 7:38 pm The 2006 Super 14 Final between the Crusaders and Hurricanes in Wellington...

Image
Christchurch. And for some reason I recalled it as being one of the Cru - 'tah GFs. But frankly, how would anyone know other than by the text on the TV screen?

The actual cameras showed at-ground vision equivalent to the inside of a grey hat.
Yes, was on Christchurch. I remember getting a headache trying to focus on the players. So gave up long before the match finished.
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Guy Smiley
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Ah, yeah ChCH... I missed MM's post.

My bad, apologies.

Reading some of the posts above and scorelines in multiples of 3... I drifted away from Rugby Union for a few years after moving to Sydney in the mid 80s. Partly it was the aftermath of '81 and the sour aftertaste of politics and sport mixing upset my naiivete, partly it was being outnumbered and outlouded by the locals and succumbing to the League comp which was on a different planet when it came to hype and entertainment...

but more than that, it was being bored shitless watching Grant Fox steer the ABs to a 13-12 win or loss against the Wallabies time after time.

That cnut ruined rugby for me for years.
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