Niegs wrote: Fri Dec 23, 2022 3:42 pm
weegie01 wrote: Fri Dec 23, 2022 9:14 am
Tichtheid wrote: Fri Dec 23, 2022 1:00 am
I could really do without all of that, it really drags the game into the sewer.
I know a guy who joined Melrose and is a famously niggly player prone to verbals. Some time ago, after one of his early matches, he was taken aside by the coach and told to stop it or he'll be dropped. Melrose had made decision that they they will enforce values of respect on the pitch, and whilst they may batter the opposition physically, all the little niggly stuff will stop. I have no idea if they sustained this. I am shooting with my sons this PM and will find out.
I appreciate hearing this!
In my role, I wondered where kids learned these values as it wasn't part of our 'curriculum' - the youth section is very new in this club. Most coaches are great, all good, and have the right attitude. Though I heard from a couple that two others might be taking things too seriously. We had a polite chat about values and aims. I recommended to the club once my internship ended that they need a vice-president: youth to establish and sew these things into a more robust curriculum for all age grade coaches because hiring youth coordinators each season (four months) wasn't enough to instill these deep messages, if they even make it a focus.
I'm not sure youth coaches make it a priority when the focus is winning a league? The RFU had to bring a system-wide rule to ensure kids get at least half a game. Do coaches also talk about respect, fair play, controlled aggression, teamship, etc.?
A substantial chunk (majority?) of parents and coaches are arseholes who don't understand the game and lack perspective on what winning means in a U14s match. Most teams I encountered tacitly or directly encouraged barracking the ref, few would restrain a kid whose aggression is out of control if it might benefit the team and as you say it took a central policy to give kids a game!
These things are all minor but I'll never forget being on the bench for our U13 County Cup semi (away, c.50 mile drive) and not coming on with a coach directly telling me 'we actually need to win this game' as the reason. I'm sure there are examples of this up and down the country.
I'd suggest nothing has changed and my response is the same as I've had to a few things we've had to deal with with my cricket club's juniors 'what do these parents say when asked what they did with their weekend at work the next day?'.
'I told a spotty 17 yo/ageing club volunteer ref to fuck off because he gave a decision against my son's team'
'I stopped a bunch of kids getting on the pitch to ensure we won a U15s league match'
'I offered another parent a fight in the car park during the match'
'I stepped in to ref a match and blatantly cheated to ensure my son's team won'
'I told a 14 year old he was justified in stamping on an opposition player's head because he'd got away with a bad tackle in the first half'