Saffers

[Rinkals]

Chilli, you should change your name to The Itinerant Chef. Every time I realize where you are, it is somewhere new. Where are you now?

In Port Elizabeth for my sins.

Actually PE is a lekker place to live.

It's ok ish

It's a pretty good spot.

Only problem is that it's a bit out of the way and it's not easy to get out of.

When I lived there a few years ago, there were very few flights in and out.

[‘tsek]

In Port Elizabeth for my sins.

Actually PE is a lekker place to live.

It's ok ish

It's a pretty good spot.

Only problem is that it's a bit out of the way and it's not easy to get out of.

When I lived there a few years ago, there were very few flights in and out.

I quite like PE, my business partner’s BIL is a surgeon at Livingstone. From the ER stories he tells, it seems PE might just be a small city with a big drinking problem. He tells me he was almost bored during hard lockdown.

[assfly]

I lived in Humewood for a year. Had a lekker little apartment overlooking King's Beach.

Played a bit of rugby for PE Harlequins too which was good fun.

[Chilli]

So it seems like OomSB has flounced.

It is a pity, he is a quality poster when he is sober.

[Sards]

So it seems like OomSB has flounced.

It is a pity, he is a quality poster when he is sober.

Its all Gazza's fault....completely dropped the ball and left ouboet to walk the line of desolation.

[Chilli]

So it seems like OomSB has flounced.

It is a pity, he is a quality poster when he is sober.

Its all Gazza's fault....completely dropped the ball and left ouboet to walk the line of desolation.

Who is Gazza?

[Sards]

So it seems like OomSB has flounced.

It is a pity, he is a quality poster when he is sober.

Its all Gazza's fault....completely dropped the ball and left ouboet to walk the line of desolation.

Who is Gazza?

The love child....wunderkind.

[Chilli]

Its all Gazza's fault....completely dropped the ball and left ouboet to walk the line of desolation.

Who is Gazza?

The love child....wunderkind.

I thought that that was Wazza?

[Sards]

Who is Gazza?

The love child....wunderkind.

I thought that that was Wazza?

I lose track.

Fme...finally finished the security camera's in my wifes shop. What a mission. Firstly dry walls. So need special butterfly bolts. Then the cables are too short so have to mount it up near the ceiling working upside down and left handed. 2 hours for what should be a half hour job. But at least my wife can see all of her shop on her phone if she is not there so we'll worth the effort...and me too

[Chilli]

The love child....wunderkind.

I thought that that was Wazza?

I lose track.

Fme...finally finished the security camera's in my wifes shop. What a mission. Firstly dry walls. So need special butterfly bolts. Then the cables are too short so have to mount it up near the ceiling working upside down and left handed. 2 hours for what should be a half hour job. But at least my wife can see all of her shop on her phone if she is not there so we'll worth the effort...and me too

Create a Gazza Burger and the chicken alternative the Curwin Burger

Top Sellers I am sure

[assfly]

Create a Gazza Burger and the chicken alternative the Curwin Burger

Top Sellers I am sure

Gazza Burger would have to be vegan, to appeal to the Cape folk.

[Chilli]

Create a Gazza Burger and the chicken alternative the Curwin Burger

Top Sellers I am sure

Gazza Burger would have to be vegan, to appeal to the Cape folk.

Served with cous cous.

[Sards]

Create a Gazza Burger and the chicken alternative the Curwin Burger

Top Sellers I am sure

Could look into a 150g patty filled up with breadcrumbs and animal fat to bulk it up.....you know , bulk but no substance...just filling up the roll. Smothered in sauce to make it look and taste like its something when really it isn't.

our Chicken burgers are awesome....free range on the pitch...between the uprights every time goodness...coupled with that winning feeling you get from it.

[‘tsek]

You used a very important phrase there, "rural safety".

Does he mean "urban safety" isn't important too?

Of course not.

Rural Safety is just so very difficult because of the vastness of our country, the remoteness of the farms and the brutalilty of the attacks.

So as predicted the furore around “farm attacks” and “farm murders” has died down somewhat. The facebook profiles have been changed, the banners forgotten, the politicians at either end of the spectrum have politicked, dusty old moth-eaten browns are back in the box in the ceiling. but the lived reality has not changed one bit.

I spent last week with an animal feeds manufacturing client on the South Coast, happy for a complex legal compliance audit before business starts to wind down.

At around 02:00 on Wednesday morning my wife wakes up as a result of the dogs going crazy. In hindsight it is easy to say she should not have, but she goes out of the house, with a kick ass flashlight, to investigate. She is made of stern Dutch/Norwegian/Huguenot stuff. Now the dogs barking is not unnatural as jackal and the dikkop’s (spotted thick-knees for you soutie heathens) who nest around the house often set them off. She does not notice anything and goes back to bed, thinking nothing of it.

The next morning, laborers notice that a game fence had been cut. My house is fenced with a primary perimeter, (electric fencing) with game fencing as a secondary perimeter approximately 15 meters away. To show how desensitized we have become, this was not a shock as we had a couple of hundred meters of Bonnox game fencing stolen at the early stages of lockdown (literally the day after it was installed, approx. R 2 500 per 100 meters so has commercial value). Nothing was however taken this time so the assumption is that the dogs and flashlight interrupted the process.

Suspecting that the would be thieves might return to finish the job, I organise with a friend to stay at my place the next night. At around 02:15 he goes outside to have a smoke. All quiet, the dogs (two Great Danes) don’t even come up to crotch headbutt him, which seems to be their thing currently. In retrospect this was a sign. While having a gander through the garden he notices that a dirtbike is standing outside a shed on the inside of the of the security perimeter next to the 1,8 meter electric fence. He next notices three males standing around the bike. His first reaction is to shout, followed by two, in his words, warning shots. The three males, by miracle which I cannot explain vault the 6 foot fence without setting off the alarm and bolt into three separate directions in the veld.

Now things happen fast, my wife hears the shots and immediately activates our rural safety plan, within 10 minutes two neighbours arrive with vehicles and shooting lamps and start criss crossing the veld. Spoor was found the next day, showing that at least one person lay down flat in the grass maybe ten meters from where one of the cruisers had passed. His spoor in the vehicle tracks showed that he was running at record breaking speed going the other direction after it had passed. At this point my wife notices that both dogs were foaming at the mouth and becoming hysterical with no control over their bladders or stomaches.

Another neighbour arrives and they manage to get the dogs onto the back of a bakkie. Local vet in town is contacted and he immediately opens up (around 2:45). Both dogs made it although it was touch and go for a couple of days. At 03:00 I receive a telephone call in Durban. Fortunately the call is from my neighbour across the road, a former police captain and owner of a security company who knows how to relay the situation without freaking me out. Ironically she was on holiday not far from where I was staying. Her team was on the ground and co-ordinating response so could update me without me having to try and get details from my wife, who, understandably, had gone to town to check on her dogs.

Next was a frantic process for me to try and get a flight from King Shaka.

It could all have ended differently, but we surmise the following: Three males got access to the primary area by climbing over the gate (which previously I though was impossible without setting off the alarm.) They next went to the main shed (vehicles, tractor, tools etc.) where they opened the large sliding door a fraction, enough for one person to enter. The bike blocked the way and they pushed it out, probably intending to hand objects over the fence (next to the shed) to someone on the other side. At this point they were interrupted by shots, after which they bombshelled.

We found signs of the area where they probably laid up earlier, approximately 400 meters from the house. They dropped a cellphone. It had 17 missed calls within half an hour of the shots being fired, pointing to the fact that they had a fourth “observer” or getaway driver who was outside the perimeter. Must have heard the shots and tried to contact his mates to find out what was going on. Cellphone language was Portuguese. At the end of the day nothing was taken.

All turned out ok I guess and life goes on. With all the rhetoric about farm attacks and the politics etc etc the above is the lived reality of a community (both farmer and laborer) throughout SA, 99% of whom who are far more exposed than we are, being relatively close to town with a relatively functional rural safety initiative and a fairly decent cop shop.

[Sards]

Frightening stuff. We bailed on a small holding because we weren't prepared to deal with this sh8t

[assfly]

Bloody hell. Glad to hear everyone is ok, but it must have been incredibly traumatic for all involved.

Where is your farm?

I hope the event was enough to dissuade them from trying again. But knowing them they're probably got an eye on another farm by now.

[Rinkals]

Fuck!

Glad you and your wife were okay and the dogs alright.

Portuguese, you say? Cunts.

[assfly]

Portuguese, you say? Cunts.

I assume they were Mozambican, which isn't beyond the realms of possibility.

[‘tsek]

Portuguese, you say? Cunts.

I assume they were Mozambican, which isn't beyond the realms of possibility.

That is what we conclude. Suffice to say we are tracking the owner. Happy to share the watsapp profile pick of the guy that made the 17 missed calls.

Message during a rural safety meeting last night from SAPS stock theft unit which will impact all of us. With borders being somewhat more difficult to cross and many illegals not having money to travel home, they expect a significant uptick in stock theft over December. Guess the same would hold true for petty theft and housebreaking.

[‘tsek]

Bloody hell. Glad to hear everyone is ok, but it must have been incredibly traumatic for all involved.

Where is your farm?

I hope the event was enough to dissuade them from trying again. But knowing them they're probably got an eye on another farm by now.

Thanks guys, we are in the Heidelberg area.

[Chilli]

Terrible thing to happen.

[assfly]

At least nobody was hurt.

These days it seems farmers' lives are so disposable they are killed even if nothing is stolen.

[Sandstorm]

Terrible thing to happen.

This

[Lemoentjie]

Terrible stuff, glad everyone is okay. Are you sure yet how they poisoned the dogs?

[‘tsek]

Terrible stuff, glad everyone is okay. Are you sure yet how they poisoned the dogs?

It is a type of phosphate based poison used to manage insects in crop farming. In the past two step/temic/aldicarb (rat poison primarily) was the, umm, poison of choice but since it’s tighter control poisoning was less of a concern. We have lost dogs to two step, ironically when we lived in town, doubt our dogs would have made it with two step although farm danes are tough buggers and size does make a difference.

This was put in bread and tossed towards the open garage where the dogs normally sleep. There was a 10 meter trail of the stuff that had fallen from the bread bag in the direction of travel. Thought we had picked all of it up but the grass still foamed with the rain yesterday.

What is worrying is that this is the first case of poisoning in our area. (As nothing was stolen case is one of cruelty to animals) They now sleep indoors, which, if you know danes, is what they wanted all along!

[OomStruisbaai]

Move to Alexbaai

[Sandstorm]

Move to Alexbaai

Someone might poison his dolphins.

[‘tsek]

Move to Alexbaai

Someone might poison his dolphins.

As much as I like the people, a stay longer than a month and I will willingly poison myself with Wellington VO until oblivion sets in.

[Sards]

Move to Alexbaai

Someone might poison his dolphins.

As much as I like the people, a stay longer than a month and I will willingly poison myself with Wellington VO until oblivion sets in.

Charge office coffee....let's be grammatically correct please

[handyman]

One can see it's nearing the end of the year, lot's of saffers trolling and posters happing each other. Of course, Covid has made it even worse this year. Let's hope Christmas, the holidays and a rest period can rejuvenate our posters and improve the quality of posting.

[Sards]

One can see it's nearing the end of the year, lot's of saffers trolling and posters happing each other. Of course, Covid has made it even worse this year. Let's hope Christmas, the holidays and a rest period can rejuvenate our posters and improve the quality of posting.

Ja vok. It's been a tough year. Kids only 2 days a week at school. Parents working from home.

[Chilli]

So Zondo is NOT recusing himself......................................this might become interesting.

[Rinkals]

So Zondo is NOT recusing himself......................................this might become interesting.

Christ knows why anyone thought this would go any other way.

Zondo was appointed to head the State Capture inquiry by Zuma himself, so suddenly finding out that he has a personal relationship with him now is highly implausible.

If Zondo was impartial enough (although, thinking about it, perhaps impartiality wasn't in the desired criteria for the job) to head the inquiry to Zuma's satisfaction 2 years ago it's laughable that an alleged relationship in 1997 is suddenly grounds for recusal.

[Chilli]

Nipper is that you being interviewed?

[OomStruisbaai]

Brakkies is a war zone.

[Chilli]

Brakkies is a war zone.

Ja, it didn't look so good hey?

[Big Nipper]

Brakkies is a war zone.

Ja, it didn't look so good hey?

As opposed to Brakkies on any other day?

[Chilli]

Brakkies is a war zone.

Ja, it didn't look so good hey?

As opposed to Brakkies on any other day?

Fair point.

Ate at Divinos last night. Very "affordable"

[Big Nipper]

Ja, it didn't look so good hey?

As opposed to Brakkies on any other day?

Fair point.

Ate at Divinos last night. Very "affordable"

Where is Divinos?

[Chilli]

As opposed to Brakkies on any other day?

Fair point.

Ate at Divinos last night. Very "affordable"

Where is Divinos?

Mont Pleasant, in Buffelsfontein Road